I'm Happy Strolling with Fate Today..

“Fate is like gravity. You can jump up and down until your heart’s content, but the earth still falls into the sun, and the sun still courses through the galaxy, both indifferent to your short-lived and insignificant defiance.”


So, I got to thinking about fate lately.

About the way things have worked out in this crazy SWorld.

This year in SL hasn’t been a 100% smooth ride – I can assure you of that. There have been snags, and drama and bumps (bumps galore). But it’s been one hell of a ride regardless.

But I think..in the end..the bumps made the ride better. Not at the time, I mean. But now.

The bumps showed you what was what and who was really..real.

And through the bumps and the snags and the drama..things worked out.

Not everything. Not 100% with a perfect TV ending.

But most things. The good things came through.

So I started thinking about my original Spank Pack. Borday, Kim, BigD, Kaarl and Ehric. The original six troublemakers that prowled Second Life in a pack – yes, like wolves. ROFL! What started out as just..hanging out in One World, quickly turned into exploring..and shopping and learning together.

We went though birthdays, holidays, rezz days, break-ups, make-ups and everything in between. We survived club openings and closings. We discovered land ownership, building, rezzing, prim limitations and sex beds.

We each found our place in the clubs – be it by a DJs side, at the turntable, on the stage or just on the dance floor.

Outside of the club, things changed for each of us. We adopted new friends, new hangouts and pursued new opportunities.

Yet, at the end of the day, we always found our way back home to each other. And home? Well home is where we all find ourselves at the same time; be it a club, an island, a coffee shop or a sim we invaded.

But what if that first event had never happened?

What if I’d never walked into ROB’s?

Furthermore, what if I never met ANY of the spankers? What if Crighton hadn’t spoken to Gal who set him up at ROBs? Where would we have heard that first spank? Without the spank..would there be Spankers? What if..I’d never met Kim? Who would be my partner in crime? What if I’d never met BigD? Who would have danced with me at OW? What if I’d never been introduced to Kaarl? Who would have been my bodyguard? And if I’d never wandered into Barefoot Beach, where would the Blissie Cave be now? What if I’d never bought that pillow that started the first pillow fight with Ehric? And most importantly, what if I never met Moo? What if I had never put on that one particular dress on the dancefloor at One World..and Kim announced us married? Who would be my SL best friend?

Every little moment in SL..has lead to a bigger moment. Every time someone (KIM) said “Hey, want to come to this club?”, it turned into something that changed my SLife. Whether it was meeting someone new, or discovering something different..or learning a new trick to getting SL to cooperate – something always came out of everything we’ve done.

So..maybe..what I’m trying to say (now that I’ve been typing this for two days and I’m tired of looking at it), is that no matter what SL has handed us..we’ve worked with it. Found a way to joke through things, hoo it up and spank our way into a better place. We, as a group, have grown. Taking on people who fit into our happy little family with their great attitudes, their charm and their sense of humor. Too many to list now.

I do believe that fate brought the Spankers to me. I do believe that no matter how far we travel from each other in this crazy sworld, we’ll always find our way home – even if it’s for a brief moment. And the bumps we experience on the way..make us that much better. Teaches us that much more about ourselves and others.

And I’ve extended this offer before, but here it is again:

I’ll slide over. You’re always welcome to hop into the Spankmobile and take this crazy ride with me. With all of us. Drop me an IM in-world. I’ll have BigD pick you up at the Short Bus bus stop. ;-)


Until next time,
B

PAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAPAMEFIRSTMEFIRST!

Recently I went to the Hall of Science with my nephews. There’s a game in the interacrive section where you’re supposed to think ahead – mathematically, of course. And from there, you move your little dragon pieces until there are no pieces left but this doomed red one. Whomever gets left with the red one is the ultimate loser. Stuff like that loses my attention in a snap – I won’t even lie about it. So I sat on a bench and watched a few people and their kids do it. One dad explained it to his son and they systematically tried out the math involved in not getting the red one. They hive-fived and moved on. Another dad watched his daughter do it, mostly uninterested, as he chatted on his cell phone. And then there were the last two dads that grabbed my attention. The first dad hammered at his son – maybe 10? – about the concept of thinking ahead. He was playing another kid, nervous. And when he lost? His dad berated him. Called him stupid and growled at he stalked off – leaving the kid just standing there feeling über-horrible. And then there was the last dad. The one who you knew was kind of “special”. And he watched his son play another kid – cheering them both on. And when the time came for someone to end up with the red dragon, he reached down and took it. “I lost.” And his son hugged him and he beamed. And well..heck. That’s what good dad’s do. When they can, they take the hit for their kids.

And it got me thinking about my dad. My dad that, when I was a kid, was the one that came home and did homework and laundry and cooked and attended all of my school plays. My dad that, while he was doing the above, also worked seven days a week. My dad that worked nights so he could be home to take me to school and pick me up. That’s not to say my mom was absentee in any way. She worked longer hours though – my mom was climbing the corporate ladder while my dad was playing Chutes and Ladders. When my dad would drop my mom off at the gym, he’d take me to Toys R Us and let me buy Jem dolls. Needless to say, I had all of the Jem dolls and their accessories by the time the winter rolled around and my mom stopped going to the gym.

Before my dad got sick, I took him to see a show on Broadway for his birthday. He’d never been before and I was excited. I got Jersey Boys tickets, made reservations at Morton’s Steakhouse and we met up – just the two of us. And we chatted and ate (he ordered his favorite glass of Shiraz and I ordered my favorite Pinot Grigio) and we even had the biggest molton lava chocolate cake ver (my sweet tooth is only surpassed by my dad’s). Then we skipped the cab and walked down to the show. We sat in our seats and when the music started..and everyone started singing along with the Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons hits, it was amazing. The energy, the laughter, the emotion..the everything that Broadway is. And when we left the theater and caught a cab home, he put his hand out – I think more on instinct than anything – so that I didn’t cross the street alone. And I laughed to myself and held his hand – which, no matter how old I get, will always be three times the size of my own..and the safest hands God ever made.

I don’t know how to articulate how important that night was for me. Shortly after that night, my dad got sick..and he can’t walk much now without his cane. It was really the last thing I got to do with my dad that he enjoyed without pain or worry that was just OURS.

And I think back. Not to just that night..but to before that. As a kid, my dad’s hair was black..his face unwrinkled..his posture imposing and his voice booming. As time passed, his hair became salt and pepper..laugh lines developed..and his voice softened. His stance was no longer for fear..but more for respect. And sometimes I tease him..calling him a little old man. I’ve been lucky to have the parents I do..who love me the way they do. And my dad..well, he’s the one that spent most of my time as a little kid with me. He’s the one that can pick up the phone and know from my voice when something is wrong. He’s the one that, before I leave home to go back to my apartment, has food packed and waiting for me to carry out. He’ll always be my biggest hero. Because..that’s what good dads are to their kids.

The funny thing is..when I went to see my parents last they were watching a movie in bed. I hopped in and covered up between them, just like I did when I was a kid (except now there were no siblings trying to get in too..just the grandkids who came clamoring up the stairs and into the bed!) and hugged my parents. They’re getting older..and I keep that in mind, and watching my dad’s health decline of the years makes me spend as much time as I can with them..call them as often as I can. I suppose one day, if I’m lucky, I’ll have a Sunday morning like my parents did last weekend – relaxing in bed and watching a movie with my love of more than thirty five years with all of my special little ones around me.

Let’s face it, my bed’s nice. But..their bed’s always going to be nicer (especially with four little kids and one BIG kid crammed in it, all yelling for attention).


XOXO,
B

The Institution of Marriage

Dear Married Friends,

Please do not feel offended in any way, shape or form by the following.

At this point in my life, I do not believe in marriage.

Do I believe in love? Romance? Passion? Yes.

The institution of marriage? No.

I don't believe that a ring..or an elaborate wedding changes feelings. I don't think it stops someone from cheating..or lying or leaving.

I do believe that love is strong enough to stop those things.

Someone asked me today why I wasn't married. And quite frankly..I couldn't think of any other good reason besides..I didn't really want to be.

I'm happy as is.

I'm happy just..being happy.

I've also been asked why Moo and I aren't partnered.

Well..truthfully..we have yet to run across an SL couple that partnered and then stayed that way.

So..why mess with a good thing?

Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell have been together forever and a day. And they're not married. Never in the tabloids..never.

But the married folks. Well..they cheat. And get caught. And run off with other people. And..the damage is worse..because you've made that promise. That promise of forever.

Well..why put everyone through all of that?

I'm not saying I don't EVER want to get married.

Maybe three years down the line that'll be my thing.

Maybe I'll want that formal tie to someone else.

Maybe I'll not want bastard kids and stuff. LOL

And before you go off thinking my parents are horrible role models..they're not. They've been married for 37 years this year. But the thing is..my mom is my dad's second marriage. His first was in his early 20's. And maybe..if he had waited..instead of diving in head first into marriage, he wouldn't have gone through a nasty divorce.

I'm not saying marriage is a bad thing. But it's a BIG thing.

Too big to just..hop into.

For now. Well..

I'm content just being.

Yeah. Just being..is okay with me.

:)




XOXO,
B

Hubba Bubba..

Hey there.

Welcome to my weekly social commentary, which I anticipate will make no sense.

Think about this.

Something about being part of a crowd skews your vision – whether it’s what you say, what you think or what you buy. It creates a cloud around your head that makes you judge and allows you to BE judged (by those you know, and even by total strangers). You fall into a stereotype of the group. You become prey to those who aren’t a part of the group and you become fodder for those that are.

Hang out with pretty people? You’re vain.

Hang out with smart people? You’re a geek.

Hang out with popular people? Then you’ve GOT to be fake.

And the talk. True or not..people believe the talk.

I heard the best advice not too long ago. If you want be part of this world, people will talk. Eventually. You gotta decide if all this is worth it.

And some days..it is.

Other days..eh.

But like the good doctor says..

Life is like a lions fight. So chin up, put your shoulders back, walk proud, strut a little. Don't lick your wounds, celebrate them. The scars you bear are the signs of a competitor. You were in a lions' fight. Just because you didn't win doesn't mean you don't know how to roar.

Keep it in mind.


Until next time,
B

"The present in New York is so powerful that the past is lost."

John Jay Chapman


My town.

There's nowhere like it.

New York City.

The capital of the World.
Contrary to popular belief, New Yorkers aren't cold and vicious. We're blunt and honest. And while we'll knock your tourist ass down for standing in our way, we'll rally around like family in a crisis and take care of each other in a heartbeat.

We ARE crass. And tough. And desensitized. We walk with purpose - smooth straight steps - everyone's got somewhere to be. We look through you, not at you. We walk by celebrities like they're panhandlers. We think drag queens ARE the norm.

We are Sex and the City. We are Gossip Girl. We are Law & Order.
We are original and untouchable. We are the ultimate trendsetters.

We ARE cocky because – hell yeah, we ARE that great. :)

We ARE the city that never sleeps.

Ever land in JFK at night? Look down on the brightest lights ever and take a deep breath. Breathe in the air that fuels a million stories. I dare you to find that anywhere else.

We are the town of brunches with mimosas..of salons where you spend more time gossiping and sipping white wine than getting your hair done. We're the land of the insanely high heels and the too expensive handbags.

We're the place where Wall Street matters most.

We are the ultimate snob town.

We own apartments on the upper east side..and houses on the waters of the Hamptons. We pay all of our life savings away to live like this just for a few months.

I’m sure where you live is great.

But.

I couldn’t live anywhere else in this whole wacky world.

Because, baby..NOTHING tastes like New York.

Until next time,

B

What a Week..

A few weeks ago, I posted a blog about wandering around the American Cancer Society sim, meeting new people and seeing SL in a very different light.

Well. After I met Bryan and Glenna, things took on a life of their own. They introduced me to Arizona who helped me join Team Relay Rockers in the Relay for Life (a division of the American Cancer Society). She gave me donation kiosks, notecards, guidelines and more.

As Borday would say, my wheels started turning (faint burning smell generally indicates that..). I knew that running a one day party/event would be tricky. It always conflicts with someone's schedule - work/DJing (ahem)..and then we all know RL sneaks in and takes over on the weekends as well. So I figured..a week long event. Everyone would have a chance to catch at LEAST one night, right?

So many clubs, so many choices - each owner always MORE than willing to be generous with their club space and time. But the club I spend the most time (and came equipped with my two favorite DJs) was The Bee Hive owned by, none other than the always willing to help, Busybee Beaver. I think her return IM to my initial inquiry came about two seconds after I sent it. Zero hesitation. :)

The plan? We'd run a week long event - during the usual Bee Hive operating hours - encouraging everyine to put all tips into the donation kiosks. Usual contest money was thrown in as well, with contest winners for the nightly themes receiving goodies from our favorite designers/builders.

And when I IMed my most excellent partner in crime, Kim, for help? Another "YES!" IM with zero hesitation. And everyone knows, when you have a partner in crime, only good things can follow.

So with Kim, Busy, Borday and Crighton on board to give up their time and money for a good cause, we got to planning. Theme nights..prizes..freebie give aways. The whole nine. The culmination of our madness was to be a Spank Pack auction - where you could buy your own member of the Spank Pack for a PG date of your choosing.

With generous hot spots and builders - like Moxie, Alternate Metaverse, Realasm, the Savoy, Jenda, Am, Cataplexia and Bill - we were stocked with great stuff!

And so the week started with the Brandefuzzism's kicking off in high gear. 15,000L on the first night from the generous trivia fiends!

Gilligan's Island docked at the Bee Hive, as did "Wear Your RFL Gear" night.

Friendly Fire came in and ROCKED the house for Party Like a Rockster night. We couldn't have asked for anything better than REAL rockstars to tear the Bee Hive up.

A few insanely organized e-mails from Kim and fright inducing IMs with Crighton brought us to the auction night.

And so..we all kinda had little mini-freak outs. What if nobody showed? What if nobody bid on it? What if we didn't meet our 50,000L goal (I had 50,000L, and Kim was optimistic with 100,000L)? What if we had gotten all dolled up for nothing (do the guys even HAVE these fears? If so, they SO don't show it)?!

And the night began. Crighton reads the notecards, Kim and I shouted our asses off - trying to keep up with the bids and chat and the music. And everyone came out. I mean..EVERYONE came out to support us..to support the Bee Hive..and ultimately to support the Relay for Life. Bidding wars broke out - both hysterical and awe inducing (the amounts were insane). Heck, even I got swept up, bidding 20,000L (uhm..I don't HAVE 20,000L..so I prayed a little for someone to bid higher..ROFL). A phone in bid was placed for Busy by Ehric (with a slight threat of abuse if anyone dared go higher). I put my gun away and let Moo go up (though I think he went for far less than he's worth because people were afraid of getting shot..). Jenda took the lead, netting 40,000L (for a PG date!) as we all gawked at the kiosk which now well surpassed 100,000L.

Well, I'm glad *I* didn't have to follow Jenda in the lineup (sorry, Kim) - talk about scary! But we ladies didn't do too badly.

And at the end of the night? We had raised 233,030L. Almost $900US.

I think I was just short of passing out.

I was tired. Kinda felt like I'd been yelling for two hours in RL. LOL !

But..I was wired and giddy.

I counted and re-counted and triple-counted the kiosk totals. The amount was really right.

I think I may have told everyone at the Bee Hive (post-party) that I loved them..fifteen times. LOL

My fears..well..they had washed away when I shed my clothes to dance around in a bikini. And now..I was just so..happy. To feel like we'd done something to fight this monster that, as you all know, touches everyone.

I can't thank everyone enough to being a part of this - for working with me, the Relay Rockers and the Relay for Life, to help the American Cancer Society work towards a cure. I can't thank you enough for donating your time, your money and your energy into this week. This would never have been such a great success without you all. A Friendly Fire..well, they donated their time and tips and rocked the house. Thank you Case and Mack for being such great supporters of the RFL.

And a special thanks to Kim..because without her, I think it's certain I would have drowned. :) Thanks for being my smilie face life preserver Kim.

And now..some pics!

And now? Post-fundraising week?

Well..I'm just taking it easy now. :) Because I'm pooped.

Until next time,

B

What Type of Food Are You ?

You Are Mexican Food

Spicy yet dependable. You pull punches, but people still love you.

What Kind of Food Are You?

A Day Out at Sea..

Crew on Kim's boat, Resilience. BigD was on the other side of the sail..I think he was making kissy faces at me, though. Hmm.

After I ran the boat into an island..we all relaxed and stretched our legs.

Ehric had to talk Busy back onto the boat. She was scared of my sailing.

:) Pretty girl pose on Moo's boat. Yeah. I rock it better than Ehric does.

That's BigD on his side of the boat. His girlish screams were minimal. He's tough.

How the day started..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I don't think I've spent a whole day in a bikini since I was a noob.

:) From sailing with Kim as the Captain..to sailing with Borday as the Captain..it's been a pretty good day.

I sailed a little..shipwrecked us..but did set up a cute little camp side for Busy, Ehric, Moo and I.

I'm tired now. :) Hard work being a sea-chick.

Peace out, yo.

B

Sobering Reality in SL

When I started playing around in SL today, I kinda had my blog set up in my head. I'd chronicle my funny zoo adventure with Kim and BigD. Unfortunately, I've decided to make that a blog for another day.

In my entire time on Second Life, I've found that the best thing - no..really, the most unselfish thing I should say, that I have participated in have been the charity events.


Something about it makes me feel good.


So I decided I would head over to the American Cancer Society and check out their main office in SL. See if they needed a volunteer.


When I TPed into the office, I met a Caregiver. Translation..? Someone who takes care of a loved one with cancer. We chatted for a bit and he led me to a meeting currently in progress for those either currently living with cancer or survivors. And I sat for a while..and listened. And my heart broke a little..because cancer is a monster. It's a destructive monster. And then I realized..that even with this monster living inside of them..these people were still living. Still fighting and still helping each other through everything.


And SL..well..it gives everyone something. But I imagine for them..it might give them peace. Second Life is a lot of things..but..it's a place where avis don't get sick. They don't feel physical pain. They don't get vomity from medication. And when they lose their hair..well..it's because the Lindens found it more convenient to put it in their ass.


But mostly..Second Life is a place where people can connect. Where you may find people who share common shopping likes..dislikes..common music loves..and above all else, support. Support for your good days, your bad days. Your successes and your failures. Your pain and your joy. And..now that I've witnessed it firsthand, your sicknesses and your health.


I never expected SL would be a place where you could log on..and find someone who may have just gone through what you're going through physically..and tell you what to expect. They can assure you of what will pass..and comfort you when you feel inconsolable.


And this Caregiver who was kind enough to lead me to the meeting? Well, he also took me to a church he built at his home for he and his wife. And I lit a candle for my dad and added it to the dozen or so candles he had lit for his loved ones.


And it's tough.


You know.

To not have control over everything in life. Especially your own body. Not not have something you can physically fight..just detroy your body. And to watch that happen to someone you love..well that's equally as hard.


And this has been a heavy post. :) I'll lighten up next time, I think.


I'll even post pictures to relieve the edge on this post.





Remember to get a physical. :)




Ladies, don't forget your mammograms!

I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge -- myth is more potent than history -- dreams are more powerful than facts -- hope always triumphs over experience -- laughter is the cure for grief -- love is stronger than death. ~ Robert Fulghum

Until Next Time,

B

Art and the Second Life..

Art will remain the most astonishing activity of mankind born out of struggle between wisdom and madness, between dream and reality in our mind. ~ Magdalena Abakanowicz


There is something to be said for the Art World. And while my Second Life has mostly become about exploring new types of music, I can never stray too far from my love of art. And while I was not successful in finding any Andy Warhol exhibitions (come on..he's AMAZING, and putting all of his artwork together in one SL venue is more than could be imagined in RL), I did fall into the Second Louvre - SL's version of the Louvre Museum. And while the art is mostly that of SL artists on the wall, it was fun.



I've always wondered why art doesn't have a bigger presence in Second Life. Is it because of copyright/ownership issues? Because people would rather share their OWN artwork than those of artists long since gone from this Earth? I've seen the Vincent Van Gogh exhibition..I've checked out Mona Lisa at the DaVinci Museum and posed with Greco/Roman statues at the Second Louvre, and I have no answer. While today's world has some of the best artists - recognized and those not so recognized, we can't possibly forget the Great Masters, can we?

As we pay homage to the great literary masters (past and present) by keeping them alive in schools (To Kill a Mockingbird, anyone ? *ahem*) and remaking the books into movies (Beowulf, anyone?), we should do the same with art. Sure. Art comes in all forms. It can inspire, it can offend, it can repulse, it can awe..but at the end of the day, art is just that. Art. It's for you to think about and discuss. Mull over. Decide what style suits you best. What colors..textures..images provoke you to think, to speak, to act. What makes art..MOVING to you.

So..if you get a chance..pop into the various museums/cultural institutions in Second Life that you may not be able to visit in Real Life.

Hey..you never know who you'll run into.. :)

P.S. - If only the Met and MOMA would make a presence here. :) Talk about bringing art to the World. Hooooooo!

Love,

B