Saturday, May 17, 2008

The Institution of Marriage

Dear Married Friends,

Please do not feel offended in any way, shape or form by the following.

At this point in my life, I do not believe in marriage.

Do I believe in love? Romance? Passion? Yes.

The institution of marriage? No.

I don't believe that a ring..or an elaborate wedding changes feelings. I don't think it stops someone from cheating..or lying or leaving.

I do believe that love is strong enough to stop those things.

Someone asked me today why I wasn't married. And quite frankly..I couldn't think of any other good reason besides..I didn't really want to be.

I'm happy as is.

I'm happy just..being happy.

I've also been asked why Moo and I aren't partnered.

Well..truthfully..we have yet to run across an SL couple that partnered and then stayed that way.

So..why mess with a good thing?

Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell have been together forever and a day. And they're not married. Never in the tabloids..never.

But the married folks. Well..they cheat. And get caught. And run off with other people. And..the damage is worse..because you've made that promise. That promise of forever.

Well..why put everyone through all of that?

I'm not saying I don't EVER want to get married.

Maybe three years down the line that'll be my thing.

Maybe I'll want that formal tie to someone else.

Maybe I'll not want bastard kids and stuff. LOL

And before you go off thinking my parents are horrible role models..they're not. They've been married for 37 years this year. But the thing is..my mom is my dad's second marriage. His first was in his early 20's. And maybe..if he had waited..instead of diving in head first into marriage, he wouldn't have gone through a nasty divorce.

I'm not saying marriage is a bad thing. But it's a BIG thing.

Too big to just..hop into.

For now. Well..

I'm content just being.

Yeah. Just being..is okay with me.

:)




XOXO,
B

5 comments:

Kimala said...

pssst... did your entry post twice?

Ok... Blissie... you non-married heathen you... (insert roll on the floor laughing) you have horribly offended me. I can now no longer club hop, shoe shop or wardrobe change with you in SL... NOT!

For me... I always wanted to grow up and be married. I knew from within the first few weeks of meeting Dave that he would be who I married. It just was supposed to be. As hard as our 4 little ones make life some times, I wouldn't trade any part of it. I am glad to have him by my side.

I think you make a fantastic point though - you shouldn't do something just because someone else can't figure out why you haven't. God, you are SO not a person like that! (anti-lemming Blissie) Partner or marry because it is what your heart wants you to do - not because it seemed like a good idea or someone told you to. And, most importantly, remember it is a super personal decision. Pfft to anyone who thinks otherwise.

Maybe you were meant to partner me and forever shoe shop in SL? Heehee :)

Happy Saturday! Glad you're back on the blogging horse again -I have missed you!

*hugs*
Kim

bigd Flanagan said...

Me, I'm not offended. It is the sweetest and the hardest thing you will ever do.I went into it thinking there is no damn way I'm going to be yet another statistic in the litany of lameness. Should some people get divorced, oh yeah. Should more people try to work things out, without a doubt!

Nothing is perfect and ever will be. We can only catch glimpses of that in your lovers sleeping face, the sun shining through your childs hair and the sound of shoes being taking out of the box for the first time. OK, I threw that one in there for you.

Institutions will come and go. They reflect fashion, trends and prevailing winds of society. If you let love guide your path you are on the right path.

Me said...

Kim - I'm afraid you're missing some equipment. Though you DO kill bugs..so that's a plus for you. LOL

:) I feel the same way, BigD. Thank you.

Kimala said...

Hey -if we were to partner in SL - I could BUY the appropriate equipment :) (kidding, only kidding) Although... we do know you can buy it. We've seen em... they are giant! Ok.. I'm not making any shameless plug for Realasm. /me zips it.

Me said...

ROFL !